Cancer season (June 22-July 22) is upon us and while folks are busy repping how much better their sign is than the other 11 (yawn), I, the Sexy Sagittarius (smirk), have decided to be more diplomatic. No sign is better than the rest. The elements and distribution of strengths in certain areas won’t allow that.

In honor of Cancer season and to simply not contribute to the hate and division that irks my soul, here are five reasons why they are wonderful, particularly why you might want to consider dating one.

But I will say the Cancer memes (especially the one that says, “What are you gonna do for your birthday? Cry?”) are HIL-AR-IOUS! Google them, LOL!

1) They are emotional.

Okay, I get it. The last thing we want to do is feel, but f*** that. In a world where we are taught to distrust everybody and their mama, it is refreshing to actually know what’s in a Cancer’s heart. Next to the Sagittarius, this soothing water sign displays just how they feel about you through words or action, but over time. If they’re feeling you, they will not stay away. If they’re not, you better believe that while they may not tell you, their absence from your life will speak volumes. Either way, you’ll certainly know where you stand with this Moon child.

2) They take care of home.

Cancerians’ moodiness makes them the least predictable of all of the astrology signs, but one thing is for sure: they’re home will be spotless thanks to their ridiculously obsessive OCD and your belly will be full—so TWO things. Those born under this sign can cook! It’s like preparing food and being at home with those they love and adore is a damn aphrodisiac! Either way, I’m here for that plate baby! Being a homebody also gives the Cancer a sense of security that other signs don’t necessarily need, so if you’re into one be prepared to spend lots of time indoors intimate style with her or him.

3) They are passionate and seductive.

You may be able to have a quickie with a Cancer but I’d strongly advise against it. If so, you’d be robbing yourself of all of the joys of being seduced. Cancers are less responsive to rushed sex and more interested (and turned on) by slow, sensual lovemaking. I’m not saying you have to buss out the candles and red silk sheets every time you get ready to get down. But trust and believe, this is definitely a sign you want to sex slowly and passionately. Live in the moment and you will not forget it.

4) They are dreamers.

If a Cancer is unhappy, you will know it. So it makes sense that they’re the first on the bandwagon for you to quit your job or take that impromptu trip to Spain. Throwing caution to the wind, this sign has a way of saying “f*** you” (eventually) to anything and anybody who doesn’t lend to their joy. Cancers are the romantic dreamers of the zodiac (only second to Pisces), so if you tell them that you’re ready to pursue a goal, they’ll be right there cheering you on.

5) They are VERY loving and affectionate.

Unlike the Taurus, Cancers are always down for some TLC. This sign is highly intuitive, nurturing and emotional, and they want to express their feelings in as many ways as possible (except for verbally with their passive aggressive asses). If you’re someone whose love  language ranks pretty high in the area of physical touch, you’re in luck.

1 Comment

  1. I love that hilarious meme! Both of my parents are Cancers-one a complete slob and the other a little anal with the cleanliness. Both good cooks and homebodies.. and hella emotional, the two most emotional people I know!

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