Everyone has a “type.”
But is your “type” good for you?
Listen. If you can point to a string of fruitless romantic encounters with people who you can deem your type, then perhaps you should re-evaluate just how well your preference is working for you. While it is great to have deal breakers, understanding who is best for you and not just who you want is a subtle key to acquiring love. Here are four ways to tell if your “type” isn’t who you need.
1) You lack spiritual chemistry.
Sure, you look good on paper, but behind closed doors you barely have anything in common. While you’re busy attempting to force a conversation, he is simply focused on doing everything but acknowledge your presence. Your souls–together–aren’t substantive. But at least you take bomb usies, right?
2) They don’t effortlessly cater to your being.
You shouldn’t have to beg the one that you’re meant to be with to love you the way that you deserve. If you are able to look outside of your relationship and find the affirmations, actions, support and empowerment that your soul so desperately seeks, then your type clearly isn’t working for you.
3) Your “type” has no substance.
I’m not going to sit here and pretend like we all don’t want someone who is physically appealing. It’ss human nature to desire someone who is fine …after all, we are hardwired to seek out attractive and solid mates in the name procreation. But if all you can say about your “type” is surface level s*** …then baby, you’ve got to dig deep within yourself to find out why you’re so shallow.
4) You feel like a trophy, not a prize.
Yes, one could argue that athletes and members of the academic decathlon receive a trophy and/or prize for a job well done. But when it comes to a relationship, you never want to be anyone’s trophy. If you type views you as simply a good looking arm piece and not someone worthy of being earned …run. When you have a mate for a prize, you cherish him or her. You recognize that they are truly golden and you’ll do whatever it takes to let him or her know how much you value them. A trophy, on the other hand, is simply disposable. Yes, you may bring it out for show, but you really don’t value it until it is time to dust it off.
By no means am I telling anyone to settle. I will never give anyone advice that I will not take myself. But if your type is really not good for your soul, it is best to work on embracing (and being) someone who is.