“Hope for love, pray for love, wish for love, dream for love…but don’t put your life on hold waiting for love.“ – Mandy Hale

If you run a Google search on how to find and keep love, you will become incredibly overwhelmed with several articles. The cute little listicles and slideshows all claim to have the secret sauce on how to attract your mate, and range from suggesting dating apps to “not looking for it.” The last part is my favorite thing to hear because it makes absolutely no sense to me. In fact, it is utter bullsh*t.

You don’t get a job by not looking for it. You also will not be fed magically when hungry, unless you’re my one-year-old Maltipoo. You cannot drive a car that needs gas unless you find some to put in it, nor can your bank account magically increase without looking for ways to generate income.

While the “I wasn’t even looking for love when I met such and such” stories are cute, what I think people really mean to say when they suggest that one doesn’t “look” for love is simply not to force it.

The truth is that in order to receive love, at the very least one must be open to it. You cannot be open to anything without being aware of its existence, and awareness brings choice. So those who “stumbled” upon love honestly had more of a hand in willing it into their lives than they’re aware of. They actually chose love.

What you emit, you get back whether it is consciously or subconsciously (I encourage you to research the law of cause and effect). When you choose to be open to love, you’re sending a signal to the universe that you are ready. By focusing on yourself you are in fact choosing love. It is that one key action that activates the karmic law of cause and effect.

Each time you focus on you …what makes you feel good, what makes you happy, practices of self-love, etc. you are organically willing love into your life. Nothing is forced, and as a result you will attract love from others.

While people who claimed they were not looking for love may not have been on every dating app or at every singles mixer, they undoubtedly sought out love in the form of self-care and appreciation.

What is the number one key to finding love? Intention. Set the goal. Believe it is yours. Work on loving self. And yes, it is that simple. You just have to choose for it to be.

We live in a world that does not operate off of handouts. Love is no different, so go get it!

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